


The Moon (Is Spinning Off Into Outer Space Without You)

by Jukebox_Bars



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Derek Leaves, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 18:14:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8906818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jukebox_Bars/pseuds/Jukebox_Bars
Summary: Home is such a lonely place without you.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Home is such a lonely place without you.

Stiles didn't understand. He and Derek had been doing so well. Their relationship had been rocky at the beginning, but they were hitting little milestones. They'd just moved into a cute little studio apartment by Beacon Hills Community College. "You want to be close to campus," Derek had said. "And I want to be close to you." It had seemed so romantic at the time, but was too good to be true.

Stiles sat in his childhood bedroom, sweating. His dad's house wasn't air conditioned like the apartment. He had been working up the courage to tell Derek he loved him and Derek crushed him. "I think we should take a break," he'd said. 

_'I think.'_

It was like Stiles' opinion didn't even matter. Derek _thought_ they should take a break. The part that hurt Stiles the most was that Derek didn't even specify what that meant. Was he going to see other people? Stiles had no clue. For all he knew Derek was at some bar hitting on girls wearing skimpy dresses.

* * *

 

Weeks passed and Stiles was still alone. Scott had dropped by the apartment to collect some of Stiles' things. It didn't look like anyone had been home since the breakup, as Scott had taken to calling it. Stiles couldn't call it a breakup. It was a break, something that had an end, it wasn't final.

Stiles' dad was a cop, the Sheriff of Beacon Hills to be exact. He had a tendency to question everything, to investigate every situation. He didn't look into Derek. Stiles begged him not to, he didn't want to know where Derek went. His father said he was foolish to await Derek's return, said that 'the Hale boy' wasn't worth it.

Derek was worth it. He would always be worth waiting for. Stiles loved Derek more and more with each passing day. It was more than romantic love, Stiles realized. He was worried about Derek. Was he somewhere safe? Stiles had hundreds of questions he wanted to ask, but if he could only ask one, he'd ask if Derek was happy.

* * *

Stiles returns to the studio apartment on the 28th of August. He'd been putting it off, but classes started on the 1st of September and he needed to settle in.

It took him four days to notice the flashing light on the answering machine.

There are countless messages from Derek's sister Laura. Stiles knew Derek had sisters, but with Laura in New York and Cora in South America, he'd never met them. The messages changed from angry accusations to pleading words as time passed. Stiles sighed in relief pressing play on the last message.

_'Stiles. It's Laura... again. I'm not going to call anymore but please call me back. He loves you, I swear to God, he does. That's exactly why he cut you off. Sometimes my brother feels too much and can't deal with those feelings so he avoids them and no matter how many times I tell him to get it through his thick skull that it's a good thing to be in love, he won't listen. All he does is lay around sulking. He missed you and doesn't know how to apologize. Please, please call me back. I won't even make you talk to him, I just need to know if I should even try anymore. Bye'_

Another four days, and Stiles was calling Laura.

* * *

 

Derek showed up at 7am on the first Wednesday in October. Stiles had opened the door to leave for his 8am lecture and there he was. Stiles wanted to me mad. He wanted to slam the door in Derek's face, but he was tired. Tired of being alone, tired of worrying.

Derek was a man of few words. Most of his intentions were expressed through his eyebrows, so Stiles was surprised to be handed a letter. He was so stunned by the unexpected action that he almost missed Derek walking back down the hallway.

Stiles shut the door and slid to the floor, pulling out his phone to email a friend to take notes for him. He couldn't even tell you who, or if the email even sent, he was shaking so hard.

Forcing himself to open the envelope, Stiles let himself think about the last three months of being alone, being without Derek, and forced himself not to cry.

_'Stiles,_

_I don't know how to say this, I don't even know if you would give me the time of day to say it, but Laura said I need to, and I agree with her. When I met you, I didn't expect much. You were just some kid that frequented the same coffee shop as me, the Sheriff's kid, as my brain always liked to remind me. You were unattainable for so long. I didn't crush over you as much as I obsessed over you. I didn't even realize I liked you until Laura told me to stop bothering her with my 'boy problems' on our weekly phone call. When you asked me out I almost choked on my food, you always tell the same story saying I was trying to decide if you were good looking enough to go out with, but that's so far from the truth. I spent so long staring at you because I couldn't believe that this beautiful, outgoing boy of my dreams was asking me out. So many things that came with being yours scared me. Meeting your dad for the first time, meeting your friends for the first time, it was all terrifying. There I was, 19 to your 17, with no job and no real ambition, living off blood money, and I was expected to impress the people that meant the most to you? It was surreal. Before meeting your dad, you held my hand and kept telling me to calm down, that he kept his firearms locked up, but all I was thinking of was the inevitable moment that you realized I wasn't good enough. I was waiting to see the frown on your dad's face when he figured out I was the last guy you'd ever want dating your kid. It never happened. Your family and friends welcomed me with open arms, tried to get to know me for who I was. I'd always thought I was holding you back, keeping you from going somewhere great, but I didn't feel that way anymore. God, everything was so perfect. It was less than a month after moving in to the apartment that I started to panic again. I should have told you, because I have no doubt now that you would have told me I was being stupid, then tried to cuddle me to death. And that was the problem. I cared about you. I cared way too much about you for my own comfort and I knew you cared back. The night I left was the hardest day since most of my family burned. Please know that leaving wasn't easy, but it was the only way in my mind. I was going stir crazy, being at home alone all the time while you were in class so I drove back to Beacon Hills to visit the Hale plot at the cemetery. I hadn't even been to the family plot since my Grandma died when I was 8. I started to talk, and it was so hard to face the feeling of loss again, but I knew if I just talked about something happy, I'd be fine. I was telling my parents all about this amazing guy I'd moved in with, and started going on and on about how much you made me smile, and how much I loved you. And that right there hit me hard. I loved you. I couldn't deny it, couldn't deal with it. Most people I love die, and I felt like I was adding you to a list of people I've let down. I look back at it now and it's so stupid. I hate myself for hurting you, for leaving you with nothing. I guess the point of this letter is to tell you that I still love you. I'll always love you whether you even talk to me again or not. You changed something in me, made me happy when I'd been sad for so long. You took this scared little boy within me and turned me into someone who was living a life worth sharing with my parents and I thank you for that. Thank you for showing me a love that I didn't know I could feel. I never expected to love someone so much it hurt, but it did. It still does. I'm sorry it took me so long to get my head out of my ass. I pushed you away, and I know that was uncalled for, but please know I love you. I will always love you Mikolaj._

_Yours forever,_

_Derek'_

Stiles read and re-read the letter for hours before opening a text thread he'd not seen in months. Trying to come up with something to express how much he loved Derek back, he ended up with a simple _'come home'_.

**Author's Note:**

> heyyy what am I doin man  
> I love Sterek so much.  
> This is based off the song 'Home is Such A Lonely Place' by Blink-182 which you should listen to even if you think you hate blink it's nothing like the good old punk rock you're remembering.  
> Should there be a sequel??? Idk I kinda like the ending but I could be inspired/convinced to keep going...


End file.
